Ugly Concealed

15 Jul

It’s only in my writing now that I feel any peace,

Its only in my writing that I don’t feel so alone,

Because for the first time—

Like a stupid teenager in some kind of melodrama

I am feeling the reality of life

The disgusting truth

That when you see the ugly side of someone especially

especially someone so close to you

That’s when you can never see them the same way

You mark it in your memory

Make sure never to forget what they’ve done

Suddenly all trust is lost

It dissolved with the actions not taken

And the words spoken

The ugliness of a person

Is never physical not to me

It’s inside a human

Inside their incapacity to do what must be done

In their constant laziness

In their preposterous ways of neglecting their duty

In their horrible way of blaming anyone but themselves.


So now I am left with knowing we are alone

My only therapy is the pen

Only their can I have friends

My characters are all me

  the parts good and bad

Because no one is perfect

 No one is completely evil

Not in the way that we think

The super villains and the heroes.

Normal people have all kinds of sides

We all got the noble hero

And the villain, waiting to make an appearance

But those who hold back are those who win

Those who show courage under the worst of circumstances

Those are my hero’s.


I am still learning right from wrong

I’m no kid

So why did it take me so long?


Maybe some people are meant to be kids forever

Maybe I’m too dumb to realize that some dreams are force-fed.


Who am I now?

But a ghost,

a wandering idiot

looking around for consolation


Betrayal is a dirty thing

I’ve learned the hard way

that when you want something done

you do it yourself

never rely on anyone

ANYONE—except yourself.


17 Responses to “Ugly Concealed”

  1. Miss Ayo Délé July 16, 2012 at 12:20 am #


    I’d like to follow your blog by email but I can’t find the widget.

    • cookie200007 July 16, 2012 at 1:41 am #

      Hey thankyou so much! I dont think I have a widget let me try to create one–and I’ll post it:)

      • Miss Ayo Délé July 16, 2012 at 1:53 am #

        Thank you. It’s the widget “Follov via email”.
        Unless I won’t receive notifications and WordPress ‘ reader don’t work very well.

  2. Miss Ayo Délé July 17, 2012 at 6:19 pm #

    Hi Karina,
    I saw your message.
    In fact you can find the widgets in your dashboard.
    In the left column, there is widget somewhere.
    You click on it, you choose the widget (follow by email) and you move it to your sidebar with the mouse. You can configure the message and register.
    I’ll try to paste screenshots in my contact page.

    Meanwhile I will think about cheking your blog for new posts.
    I like your blog too.



    • cookie200007 July 17, 2012 at 9:41 pm #

      Ah you are absolutely amazing,
      thankyou so much for helping me!!
      I shall try this thankyou Délé!


  3. Miss Ayo Délé July 17, 2012 at 6:44 pm #

    I can’t find your email but if you send me one at :
    I will reply with the screenshot.

  4. Intricate Knot July 22, 2012 at 8:47 pm #

    Love it. It’s raw and at certain points it fairly sizzles. Excellent work.

    • cookie200007 July 22, 2012 at 11:50 pm #

      Thank you so much. You just gave me a huge burst of happiness!

  5. Naomi Baltuck August 25, 2012 at 5:17 pm #

    So sorry for you pain. It comes through very well in this piece and is something most of us can relate to. Thanks for the follow on my blog. I look forward to catching up on yours.

    • cookie200007 August 25, 2012 at 8:45 pm #

      It’s something I had to learn, I suppose all the pain we go through can take us to different turns in this life, but its all about what we choose, thankyou for your kind words, I can’t wait to read more of your blog 🙂

  6. readinpleasure August 27, 2012 at 1:19 pm #

    A raw sensitive and honest post beautifully done. Where is your follow widget, please?

    • cookie200007 August 27, 2012 at 2:44 pm #

      Of course, I am not sure how widgets work, thankyou so much for reading, can’t wait to read more of your work 🙂

  7. Lindy Lee August 27, 2012 at 5:01 pm #

    Thank you for reading most of my poems posted here on WordPress and for becoming a follower. Your writings are the writings of experience and talent…

    • cookie200007 August 27, 2012 at 6:15 pm #

      Thankyou so much, I love your poetry they brought great inspiration, I look forward to reading more 🙂

  8. Lindy Lee August 27, 2012 at 5:02 pm #

    …life experience and artistic talent…

    • cookie200007 August 27, 2012 at 6:16 pm #

      Your words are so kind I am humbly thankful that you think so I hope one day to have that courage, thankyou, your writing is so beautiful!

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